Today, I want to talk about getting your family to share in your Hellenistic activities even if they don't follow your Tradition. My girlfriend is totally supportive of me and my religion, and will encouragingly ask me what's going on when I'm obviously doing something religious in nature. She doesn't get it, but she loves me, so all is good. Unfortunately, there are some parts of Hellenistic worship you really can't do alone. My 'dog sacrifice' during the Deipnon for example (and for those of you who now wonder if this includes an actual dog, please click that link). It only works if all members of the household touch it. The solution is to hand it to my girlfriend to admire my handiwork. Miasma absorbed, house cleaned. Mission accomplished.
Another one is a Noumenia dinner, which is supposed to be festive, special, and communal as a family. It's supposed to be a feast. The communal is usually not a problem, but as I do the groceries and cook, my girlfriend might enjoy what I cook, but it's not exactly a special occasion. Now I mention it's Noumenia, and I buy flowers for the house. I also encourage her to pick what she wants to eat that day, and while it's totally non-religious for her, we have a great meal which she thoroughly enjoys, wether it be frozen pizza, or pesto pasta, or--like two days ago--home made chicken shawarma with a crazy assortment of toppings.
I don't want these moments to feel heavy, or to force them upon her. As such, we have begun finding ways to share these events--which are very important to me--in a family manner. Non-religious for her, and religious for me. We have our little moments, and I practice my rites separately from these moments. As such, neither of us are forced into an event that we can't fully stand behind, and we still manage to bridge a divide.
I've accepted long ago, that my girlfriend will not stand at the altar with me for daily ritual, and that she won't celebrate the festivals with me, but she still enjoys watching a movie with me for a festival of Dionysos, and she's always up for getting crafty if the occasion warrants it. All in all, these things bring us closer as a couple, and while we don't really discuss the religious aspect, there is an awareness that works for both of us. We both compromise to make it work, and we still get to share wonderful moments that we both thoroughly enjoy.
Another one is a Noumenia dinner, which is supposed to be festive, special, and communal as a family. It's supposed to be a feast. The communal is usually not a problem, but as I do the groceries and cook, my girlfriend might enjoy what I cook, but it's not exactly a special occasion. Now I mention it's Noumenia, and I buy flowers for the house. I also encourage her to pick what she wants to eat that day, and while it's totally non-religious for her, we have a great meal which she thoroughly enjoys, wether it be frozen pizza, or pesto pasta, or--like two days ago--home made chicken shawarma with a crazy assortment of toppings.
I don't want these moments to feel heavy, or to force them upon her. As such, we have begun finding ways to share these events--which are very important to me--in a family manner. Non-religious for her, and religious for me. We have our little moments, and I practice my rites separately from these moments. As such, neither of us are forced into an event that we can't fully stand behind, and we still manage to bridge a divide.
I've accepted long ago, that my girlfriend will not stand at the altar with me for daily ritual, and that she won't celebrate the festivals with me, but she still enjoys watching a movie with me for a festival of Dionysos, and she's always up for getting crafty if the occasion warrants it. All in all, these things bring us closer as a couple, and while we don't really discuss the religious aspect, there is an awareness that works for both of us. We both compromise to make it work, and we still get to share wonderful moments that we both thoroughly enjoy.
No comments:
Post a Comment